To conform or to be unique?

I've been thinking about a couple of things for the past few hours, here's a little theory I just made up.

People have two desires which can explain a lot of behaviour. The desire to conform to norms and the desire to be unique. Now these two seem like opposites, and they are.

People do the same things that their peers do. They do it in a 'group'. Ofcourse, no formal groups are made, infact, no group is recognized. One person wears the latest clothes, and the other does the same. It's something like peer pressure, except peer pressure isn't the cause for the desire, but rather an amplifier. Individuals also want to be special, different: the desire to be unique.

These two desires manifest themselves in two different ways. The desire to conform(D2C) shows itself in more generic, large scale-type things. The desire to be unique(D2U) is clearly shown in the specifics of the behaviour. Heres a simple example: Everyone wants cellphones because their friends have them and they are considered cool(mostly by others, but rarely themselves). So, they get them. D2C. But each person gets a different cellphone, a better cellphone. A contest! 'My cellphone has a higher resolution','Mine has bluetooth'. It's also interesting to notice how often people look at a particular feature, THEN find a use for it. Not the other way around. This is show-offing. It's not bad. It's a part of us.

Another example: Everyone believes in God and worships him. D2C. But the competition is in the scale of the worshipping, celebration,etc. 'We had a big(ger) Ganesha', 'We had more types of food', etc. D2U.

Now, notice people. More successful people have a larger D2U, they do things their way. They are leaders. less successful people have more D2C. They are the mob, the followers, they conform to the leaders. People with more D2U are more competetive.

Now, notice the roots of D2C and D2U. D2C comes from the social requirements of humans. You want people to talk to you, to accept you, therefore try to do what they do. You bunk classes because they do. You spin in a temple, because they do. Your parents buy you stuff because other parents do, not because it's useful. D2U comes from the self esteem requirements of humans. You buy a cool cell phone because you want to show that you are 'better'. Parents buy you a cooler bike than your friends, because they want to show your friends' parents that they are better parents. There are a ton of examples.

The way people behave generally tries to satisfy both D2U and D2C. Think about it if you want.

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